President Donald Trump signed an executive order Monday encouraging both the federal government and American consumers to buy plastic drinking straws — a formal rebuke of former President Joe

President Donald Trump signed an executive order to reverse a federal push away from plastic straws, declaring that paper straws “don’t work” and don’t last very long.

Paper straws are, objectively, the worst. There’s the race against the clock to use them before they turn to mush, the temperature problem — good for neither hot nor frozen — and, worst of all, the appalling sensation when they make contact with your teeth.